Finding Big Foot

This is one hilarious show.  3 over-grown men and 1 (lesbian?) woman out there seeking 'Squatches', out in the boondocks howling, yodeling, and making other weird sounds in an effort to draw out the elusive, shy, hairy creature more fondly known as 'Big Foot'.  The YouTube comments are even funnier than the show itself.  So laughable, I sometimes forget to giggle.

According to Matt Moneymaker, James 'Bobo' Fay, Ranae Holland, and Cliff Barackman, 'Squatches' are drawn to human females, they are timid, they live in areas that are predominantly rural and heavily wooded, and they are bipedal.  Oh, yeah?  How do they know what Big Foot is really like, especially since no one has ever photographed, videotaped, caught, or otherwise socialized with such a being?

There is an extremely infamous video, which you may view at your leisure, known as the Patterson-Gimlin film, which purportedly shows a female (or so they claim) Big Foot strolling through a forested area.  She looks at them and keeps on walking...Roger Patterson-Bob Gimlin.  Roger passed away from cancer only a few years after the footage was shot, but Bob was still around as of 2011 and still standing by his story that this was a - gasp! - Sasquatch!  Matt, Bobo, and Cliff all believe the footage to actually be that of a female Sasquatch.  Ranae, the skeptic of the bunch, thinks it is more or less a human, undoubtedly in a costume.  I must state here that I agree with her.

It walks human-like.  Okay, so the 'experts' on various shows I have watched claim that it would be utterly impossible for a man to lope like that wearing an ape costume, but costumes don't have to weigh 20 pounds, folks.  And there are some very strong people out there...and when you toss fame & fortune into the mix, that makes it a wonderful incentive for a trio of guys to get together and perpetrate a hoax.  Hell, I'd do it in a heartbeat myself and who knows, I may buy a Fujifilm or other digital camera with video for Christmas and shoot some hoaxes to post to Vimeo and YouTube and who knows what other video sharing site...LOL.

Back to Finding Big Foot...

I have watched many episodes of both Season 1 as well as Season 2, and these guys are totally trippin'.  There is NO creature known as Big Foot, a Sasquatch, Squatch, Skunk Ape, or anything else of that ilk.  There are primates - us, gorillas, chimps, orangutans, baboons, spider monkeys, etc etc, but no large, hirsute, bipedal creature hiding out in the boonies.

What really gets me chuckling is when they go to the 'town hall' of these little pissant burgs and all the gun-toting, pickup driving rednecks listen attentively (you can tell by the appearance that they are largely uneducated, blue-collar, flag-waving hicks with nothing else to do with their time but attend these gatherings), then raise their hands when asked if any of them have encountered a 'Squatch'.  Anywhere from 25% to nearly 50% of the hands always go up...

These hayseeds live boring, predictable lives.  What other excitement do they get happening in those villages?  There is a great incentive for them to lie...maybe some of them are even confused.  Most just want the attention.  After all, they are getting a chance to tell their story in - drum roll - Animal Planet!

Pitiful.  Pathetic.  I truly feel sorry for Matt, Bobo, Cliff, and Ranae...out there seeking Big Foot when they have to know, in their heart of hearts, that such a creature doesn't exist.  It is only a myth, a legend, a fairy story...heck, I wish there were Squatches around.  Maybe they could be trained to attack Republicans.